Redefining What It Means to Be Seen
I used to think ‘taking up space’ meant I had to be loud.
But now, I know better.
Plenty of you reading this newsletter met me after I had done the work. In some ways, that’s a blessing—lmao. But one thing about Mee—I never hide my past. Even when I was in my era of saying anything that came to mind (whether it was necessary or not lol), I never hid my hardships.
I couldn’t be out here talking shit about people and not talk shit about myself (this negative internal dialogue definitely fed my depression). I’ve always been an open book—not for sympathy, but so folks understand that different lived experiences deserve compassion. My whole thing has always been about creating empathy wherever I go. Being a teachable moment.
TeaBoo (or maybe Big Ma?) taught me back in high school that “any room I walk in should be better because I’m in it.” and I took that personally.
I may not be the most professional, the smartest, the funniest, or the prettiest—but what I am is self-aware. I’m often the most emotionally intelligent person in the room. And that's CRAZY since I'm just a girl, from the Eastside of Detroit. One who has always been told I was ‘TOO’ something; too tall, too skinny, too smart for my own good, too loud…too much
I thought I had to be aggressive to take up space. Thought I had to argue to be heard.
Thank God for growth.
Meela’s Mood – How I Found My Chill
There were a lot of contributing factors to me finding my chill. The first one? Butter.
Her wonder, her curiosity—she showed me that there are other ways to be in the world. She softened me into putty. I no longer resort to violence as the question and the answer - even when it’s justified lol.
The second big shift came when I left Detroit. I refused to raise Butter in the environment I grew up in. From GA to IL to MI to AZ, we moved with intention—even if it didn’t feel that way at the time. And baby, lemme tell ya - NOBODY trusted the plan lmao but I did.
And then 2016 happened.
I survived a stroke. A dog attack. And another more private run-in with death. All in one year. All in Detroit.
I’m positive I would’ve unalived me or someone else if I stayed. Gotta say it again.
Thank God for growth.
Other shifts came from:
Yoga and doula trainings
The pandemic creating space, and using art as a meditative practice
Going back to school and realizing I’m good at it
Artist opportunities that blessed my life these last 3 years
Getting out of my own way, and stepping into who I was meant to be
Note: 👉🏽 Taking up space can look like simply breathing. Stillness. Dance. Silence. Ecstatic joy. Sitting in the fullness of your emotions.
You don’t have to prove a thing to deserve your presence.
